Shock Value, Big Dinger

by Dudley

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Small town kid, rising up, better watch your windows. Best natural rapper since Alfredo DuFrampe.


released December 25, 2013

Dudley - Vision, Rap Skills, Style, Flare, Flavours, Charm, Spin, Ideas man
Jacob - Production



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Dudley Sydney, Australia

Born young, die older.

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Track Name: Sucking Losers
[I call upon the Guardians of Rachtenschtal to kick out the fucking jams]

Adulthood; desolate and bereft, what is left?
Nothing but an innocence theft.
Walking with your gravitas, what happened to
phantasmagoria or your euphoria?
I vehemently fulminate, I gravitate to solecisms
yes two minds schism.
Inveterately ill, take a didactic chill,
stare at the fructuous trees
over and out your window sill.
Don't get fractious, you lack just
a bit of hypnagogic myoclonus,
sleep was your onus
but now its nothing but a bonus.
Its nothing but a bonus.

So now I'm [sucking losers.]

Would I flop it out?
Yeah, no doubt.
If it looks like a trout
that's what it's all about.

[Trout, I've got gout.]

Now this ain't flash, but I am
So when I tell ya
you'd better god damn do it mam.
And kick out the jams.
Yeah kick out the jams.
And not the kind you spread on your missus' leg for a bit fun.
You'll know what I'm talking about when it's done.
Track Name: Rendered Nookley
G'day. Hello.

I'm a good boy, you're a bad girl.

I was walking in the fort.
I forgot my cap.
Good little boys go to church at night
or they get a big slap.

Turn off the lights,
let me show you how to party
alright, lets go
to the disco
whenI will dance my moves off
and you will move out of my house mum.
Get out my house.

OG, break it down.
Flop it out, give it all your goodness.
Oh believe it.
And gosh darn it,
Hollywood Boulevard,
It's where I read my poo.
Crackers, don't hate.
They just do.
Track Name: Doodley
Dud's here, new track.
Its a jazz attack.

I'm a jazz musician.
Lets sign a petition,
to not become morticians
cos I'm really wishing
that I could split you in two
with my lyricism
and see a schism;
A little cleft in your depth little lips.
Or between your cheeks,
Not your butt ones, your face ones.
Cos you're in awe
your jaw drops to the flaw
cos I'm amazing.

Feel the jazz blasting.
I'm casting
out into the ocean blue,
through you.
I'm fishing
for compliments...
Please tell me I'm good.

Cos the ladies tell me
I'm good in the bedroom.
But if I'm on the road
you better give me some room.
I'm a shocker with the wheel
I turn it 570 degrees,
I run over your mum's grandma please.

And in the end
everybody's a can of spinach.
In the end
everybody wishes they were rich like me;
Mansion house.

I've got a mansion house,
It's where I keep my wife
and my white kids.
I drive a boat to work
I work on the docks.
I'm shining and cleaning
other mans' clocks.

can you hear me
out in the distance?
I've got persistence.
Believe in my grandpa.
I didn't mean to make you die.
I didn't mean to stab you 5 times with a butcher's knife.
Track Name: SuperCool
Yo yo yo.
Big track.
Big boy.
Whaddup Sydney?
get ready for the rap blasting.

Hey, my name's pee poo,
I've got no time for yee yoo.
You got legs, I got walkin'.
I'm a Christopher, you're a stalkin'
my mum through the trees and the leaves,
I'm gonna touch your big fat knees.
And then I'm gonna put 'em in my butt,
cos my butt is where you belong
and that's that.

Hi, my name is Jaws,
I'm gonna eat you
because I'm in a store;
Grocery store
getting some lettuce,
let us begin. Hahahahaha.

Ball sack, ball sack
touch my raging boner.
With your good arm,
good strong arm,
took it to the dude
and now I'm pooping on the farm.

Yo, full length track.
Rapping it out.
Like a big bully
crapping its trout.

Hey, my name's Silly Doodle,
I'm gonna put my butt on a poodle.
Yodel for me or I'll touch your nodel
and you'll go to the form for muh...
Is this the end of the song?
This feels like the end of the song.

Thanks for listening to my three star crappy.
And I'll see you on the flop side.
Track Name: Field of Puss
Wup Wup.

I was eating some cheese,
But then I felt really bad inside.
I'm lactose intolerant
so maybe that's why I nearly died.
My poop started coming out like a really big rocket,
but team rocket wasn't blasing off.
Just my anus,
oh it was heinous,
such a crime that you could say that
I was not a really a good guy anymore
I was kind of a criminal;
Criminally pooping.
Pooping criminally.
Hey, everybody get back,
step back, I've got a jet pack.
No I don't,
it's just my ass shooting out shit
but its okay cos the ladies think I'm flying
and now I'm fly.

I'm in a field of puss.
Uh fields of puss.
Fields of puss. Yeah.
An ocean of girls.
Haha, aha,
Gimme some of dat ass,
and now watch me do the twirly twirly

with your nipples.
I'm having sex with cripples.
I don't discriminate.
Are you black, white
or are you some sort of colour I can't name?
like a colour of a grape.
Is it green?
Is it purple?
It depends on the grape
for heaven's sake.
I'm gonna eat some cheese
and nail my cross to a stake.
That didn't make sense,
but it does if you're a vampire
and you really like your meat with you.

I'm sorry for sinning.
I've come to repent,
baby Jesus.
Give me your higher power.
Let me reach the God in heaven.
I didn't read your book
but I've heard it's got rave reviews.
Have you ever seen a man eat cheese
like me?
Please look away
if they're poopin' like I did
cos it was embarrassing
when my grandpa walked in
and there was faeces all over my shoes.
I got the poop on shoe blues
you could say.
But hey,
why do you discriminate against the gays?
Whats up with that Church? Aw.
Maybe I shouldn't subscribe to your religion.
Maybe I should pretend that I'm a carrier pigeon,
bringing the message, bringing the word
I'm not something in which feel like I'm eat gurh.


Oh say can't you see
all the poop on my eyes?
And the heavenly gouche
that I did not Vespucci.

Midgets and isotopes.
Everybody's throat is filled with good foetuses.

Baby, suck my donk.
Track Name: First Freestyle
I'm not a Kevin Spacist,
I'm a Kevin racist.
I got my hands in my face cist
and I'm a fascist paste.
Its gonna stick to you
like I'm a stick to manilla folders
cos they're real good
for organising all my older things
so I can find them
when I forget where they originally were.
I'm really cool,
but check out her.

Hey, yeh yeh yeh.
Dance break
everybody dance.
C'mon now
dance baby,

Girls in the house put your hands in the air.
Hands up, hands up.

do a similar thing.
Dancing's communal and we're uniting beings.

Feel the bass blasting, sucker.
Y'that's good one.
Track Name: Jurkin
I'm irresistible,
I'm so kissable,
You'll miss me.
If I'm a constable
I'd arrest you for being pretty.
I'm a little guy,
I've got a big heart though,
I'll show it to you but
if you squeeze me hard, I'll fart yo.

I'm a bit like a maniac
when it comes to the bedroom
I'll vacuum your wounds.
And then you'll have some blood
up in my dyson
but that's okay
cos I'm like a bison;
I'll push you 'round
until you're on the ground
then I'll stab you with my horns
until its dawned upon ya,
that ya gonna died
a little death;
le petit mort
until the end. Yes.

I like gravy,
pour it on my eyes.
I see you
on my thighs.

I'm a little bit of a poor boy,
so you're gonna have to dance with a poor boy
and I like to rhyme poor boy,
with another word, mainly the one 'poor boy'.


You march right into my heart.
You marched right into my feelings.
And now I'm exploding with joy.
Exploding with happiness.
Exploding with love.
And now I'm jurkin.
Track Name: Do Seven Men Fit Inside An Aquaduct?
Hello friends, family, and negligence,
this is my new rap song.
I've got a minimalistic apporach
and uh its just got seven lyrics.
Its uh...
'Do five men fit inside a aquaduct?'

Now, you can sing along if you want
cos its pretty easy...
and uh, because I'm a rapper,
I don't care about the producer's hard work
putting the musical track together
so my luscious voice can just glide over it...
But um, I guess we'll start with the uh entertainment now.
But be ready to help me out and sing along!

Do seven men fit inside an aquaduct?

Peace out homies,
don't abuse your mum.
Or I'll stab you in the sphincter.
Track Name: Good Happy
Hey Jemimas
get out your vaginas.
Its time to jam,
I'm a man
I've got two big arms
and they stretch out like hands.
I've got wings baby,
watch me fly
through the night sky
with my eyes open...
but so is my fly.
My cock is flopping through the clouds
I'm feeling loud.
I'm gettin' rowdy
and the crowd's gettin' crowdy.

Everybody's taking off their gym pants
cos they sweated them off
and now its time to dance.

It's time to dance with me.
Time to dance with Dudley.

For crying out loud
I don't like myself anymore,
I've got a low self-esteem,
I'm a whore.
Track Name: The Day The Dog Got Out
Yeah. Woo.

The day everything went dark.
Everything went down.
Yeah, I saw my pet
lose his sense of direction.

Well the day the dog got out.
Oh, I cry.
Why cry
when your daddy sent whatever he sent you?


Did you see the way it smiled back at you?
Fight back against the bad guys.
Before they take all your jive.